i don't know. do you feel as ashamed as i do saying those words sometimes? and to the most basic questions, like: how are you, how's your day going, what's new with you, how's the job search going, how's the church search going, what's your take on the issues of the day, etc. lately it seems as if every question asked of me at any level of the tinalife provokes this oh-so-valedictorian response...I DON'T KNOW. Remember that movie "Reality Bites" with Winona "let's get past the whole crime crap and remember what a truly fine actress she is" Ryder? When she's standing at the podium speaking as the head of her class at her graduation, and regarding how to face the future, she says "the answer is...i don't know." I'm starting to move past the initial shame of that statement, and onward to the freedom that is found in what theologians call "the cloud of unknowing." it is an exhilarating exhale of grace to realize, it's ok for me not to know. in fact, it is a declaration of the utmost honesty, integrity, and truth. simply put, as the human finite beings we are, we are not capable of possessing complete and meaningful answers to any of life's questions on our own. to this i say, "cool!" because i'm not the mistress of my universe, your universe, or the big weird wild universe in which we live. so next time you are tempted to save face, or dive into a serious image management moment, try being honest. no matter what your combo plate of circumstance is, it is not the time for phony interaction and self-delusion about anything ever again. wake up, me! wake up, you! wake up, us! let's throw up our hands and admit it once and for all, WE DON'T KNOW! Hallelujah, for once we get to that delicious liberty, we get in touch with the one who really does know.